From Smary to Barmy

I just don't get it?

If Scotland declared themselves as independent from the UK elections, then why when Tony Blair retires are we ending up with a Scottish Man running our country? It just doesn't seem right. If those Scottish people didn't want to be a part of our government anymore, why are we ending up with their dregs?

Shouldn't we be allowed to vote for the new leader of our country? I myself would have voted for that man with the dog. He always seemed ever so nice to me, as there ain't many men who show so much commitment to an animal, he went everywhere with that dog. Whatever happened to him?

It's a shame that really nice man they named that Bitter after died, as I always wanted him to be PM. He looked like he had soft hands, before he died that was, I should imagine by now they are rather decayed or just bones with a little bit of flesh left on them.